Friends We Meet Along The Way

For some reason tonight, my mind is just all over the place.  I have got alot going on inside right now. My mother always told me I wear my heart on my sleeve, that I am too emotional, far too sensitive.  She told me I need to be STRONG.  What is strength?  Does it mean you don’t cry tears?  Does it mean you don’t have a soft side?  And tonight as I was pondering over all of this, I realized that we cannot always be STRONG.  Sometimes we are weak and that is why we have friends. Those friends are our pillars, the place we go to for strength when we cannot find it in ourselves.  Though I have only a few very close friends in my "real" world, I would hope that if I need a place to turn, they would be there.  Or if they needed a place to turn, I could be there for them.  My own best friend of 22 years suddenly last November (after not hearing from her at all for 5 yearsshe called me on my birthday to say hi.  For that one little moment in time, it felt as if no time at all had passed.  We were giggling, talking about old times, etc.  Now, 3 months later, she has called me 1 time and written me 1 email.  Yes she knows all of my secrets (even the ugly ones), but when do you just let it go?  When do you say enough is enough?  I want a best friend… not just someone who feels they are "obligated" to call me every so often. Do I just accept that this is the point we have come to or do I just let it go?  I was without her for 5 years and learned to just accept that fact.  It is not just the 5 years, there is more.  Way more damage that was done.  I am hurt and confused.